The Substitute: V for TheRapist: da, da, da, daaaa

Well, it seems like forever and a day since our hero has been chronicled in the throw of Physical Therapy. But as you may have seen we have determined that plantar fasciitis is really an extreme right wing action used to keep runners grounded and down out of our runners high. Well, a shake my fist at you plantar fascists. Because shaking my foot won’t help and kind of looks stupid.

So let me explain, no that will take to long. Let me sum up. Last we discussed TheRapist I has gotten reluctant permission to run again and start my training. Did I mention that I am running the Goofy Challenge. I was told to run as long as I did not run through the pain. I agreed and frolicked out the door laughing maniacally toward my running routes.

Well, that did not stop the domination and torture of my feet and Achilles. No it was to continue. I had a chance to stop but I was assured that there was no stopping me so I must keep going just to maintain the same level of injury and not allow my legs to get into much disrepair.  I believe the words my TheRapist spat out was “You runners, I swear.”  She even admitted that she knew that she could not stop me once she let me start running again.

Either way, have been running along and going to my enhanced interrogation at least once a week for the past month and a half.  It has been great.  I would go in and she would ask how many miles I have run and what was hurting most.  Then she would flip me over and make that part hurt more.  I guess that will teach me to stop getting hurt.  Any how, it has been pretty good.   Plus I get a lot of reading done.

Then it happened.  Lets Scooby Doo to just yesterday.  Doodly, do, doodly, do.  I get a message on my cell phone.  It is PT+ (Physical Therapy Plus) telling me that my usual TheRapist will be out but I will be getting some one else to step in.  What’s this, a Substitute TheRapist?  Oh my.  Maybe just maybe this substitute will be more gentle and ask me where it hurt and avoid those sections.  Maybe it will the most pleasant experience and I will move through a wave a euphoria toward a state of Nirvana.  Nevermind, we shall see this substitute and test her for all her TheRapy prowess. 

I get in and as usual I get started off with heat.  Actually, I had to scrape the black fuzz off of my feet.  I don’t know what it is but I only where the socks that shed on the days I go to Therapy.  I don’t do it on purpose, I just put on what ever socks I got an actual pair of ready.  I move on and the substitute introduces herself and we discuss what it going on.  At this point I don’t even wonder why it is that I don’t remember her name.  She could have inserted in between every third word and I would not have caught it.  It is just my way with names.  I flip over for some ultra sound and the gel is cold but everything is cold today.  It seems like in a cost cutting measure, Delaware has turned off the heat.  Nothing special here where I get ultrasound and really don’t feel much.  It is a prolonged affect thing. 

 Then goes the manual work.  This means massaging and manipulating my muscles, tendons, and feet till I can no longer tune out the pain with reading.  I get a “man are you tight.”  At this point I informer her that I ran 32 miles over the weekend and am a little sore.  Then this is where it all changes.  She flips me over onto my back and works my feet and ankles over some more.  At one point in a ridiculing tone I hear, “Ankle goes this way, not the other.  Where is your flexibility?”  Then she does the same thing with the other foot.  Evidently my feet are supposed to flex left and right.  Weird.  More agony and at one point she even asked if I am okay.  Brain thinks and mouth says, “Bring it on”

Then it happened, we move on the lovely ice.  This is coupled with stim (a.k.a shock therapy).  I hear mutter of how our substitute doesn’t like to use stim but it seems to work.  So the shock pads are put on the bottom of my feet and turn up.  It is so funny watching my toes curl up when the current is cycled through.  What a hoot.  I get a through a few more pages of my book and then I realize I cannot take the pain in my foot anymore.  It was turned up way to high and even I the man that I am with the fantastic calves that I have knew when to call it a day.  They quickly turned it off and let me settle down with just ice. 

In the end, it was all good and the Substitute was as effective as my TheRapist in making my appreciate the best part.  The end of the session.

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